Nobody Knows Anything

Today I ran across this article, which notes the attempt by Nestle in Australia to copyright two images of coffee in a mug:

At stake are two images of coffee; one is a cup of black coffee in a white cup viewed from above.

The other is an image of a red coffee mug, viewed from the front.

If Nestle is successful coffee roasters, sellers and even cafes risk breaching copyright if they use images similar to Nestle’s.

And you just wanna say, Are you kidding? Of course they are not: companies are not screwing around with this stuff, because every tiny victory they win pushes the envelope for exactly how far they can go in owning every image, word, thought. Copyrighting a particular instance of coffee in a mug? Hey, have at it. (Although, that would be a trademark, wouldn’t it? Damn, I can never remember this stuff.) But to own the actual concept of coffee in a white or red mug?

Ye Gods. The sheer gall.

I fully expect all of my friends to sign up for this in lieu of, you know, developing craft:

Casting Call For Reality TV Show Contestants…

“At Last, You Could Become America’s Next Best Selling Author and Reality Show TV Celebrity!”

The newest reality TV show, Book Millionaire, is providing applications and holding casting calls for people who want to become published authors or those who are published and want to achieve best selling status.

Eight people with dreams of seeing their book ideas become published and being the next author launched to best selling and celebrity status will meet Book Millionaire’s Publishing Committee during July 2005 to start filming of Book Millionaire Reality TV Show.

Here’s your chance to finally become America’s next Best Selling Author and Reality Show TV Celebrity! We are scouting for the next group of candidates for America’s hottest new reality show. Act now. Picture yourself featured on national television sharing your story, writing, book-to-be or book with millions of people showing you have what it takes to be America’s next Best Selling Author and Book Millionaire.

At last…

Why do I find myself hoping this is some kind of Internet scam and not an actual show?

Update: Lee Goldberg has a longer analysis of this.

Hey Rob! I was right! He is trying to jumpstart the Apocalypse.

t was an e-mail we weren’t meant to see. Not for our eyes were the notes that showed White House staffers taking two-hour meetings with Christian fundamentalists, where they passed off bogus social science on gay marriage as if it were holy writ and issued fiery warnings that “the Presidents [sic] Administration and current Government is engaged in cultural, economical, and social struggle on every level”葉his to a group whose representative in Israel believed herself to have been attacked by witchcraft unleashed by proximity to a volume of Harry Potter. Most of all, apparently, we’re not supposed to know the National Security Council’s top Middle East aide consults with apocalyptic Christians eager to ensure American policy on Israel conforms with their sectarian doomsday scenarios.

But now we know.

(Via Atrios. Like you need a link to find Atrios.)

On a rainy day, at home with the kids because I can’t find my damn car and house keys anywhere:

• Since The Passion of the Christ can be abbreviated to POTC, can we call it The Passion of the Christ: Curse of the Black Pearl?
• My friend Rob suggests: The Last Action Savior.
• I also liked the guy who does reviews on Slate and “Fresh Air”: the Jesus Chainsaw Massacre.
• But my question is: will this be Mel’s Battlefield: Jesus?
• In case you can’t tell, I have no plans to see POTC. Darin stayed home yesterday (mental health day) and I told him to tell everyone at the office that he stayed home in order to be first in line at the movie.
• TBOGG is running a Bush/Cheney slogan contest.
• Best Bush/Cheney slogan I’ve heard so far (on the Well, I think): “Don’t change horsemen mid-Apocalypse!”
• In case you can’t tell, I have no plans to vote for Bush.
• I told my sister that things have changed so much that for the first time I’m thinking of donating money to a presidential candidate. “Which one?” she asked. “It doesn’t matter,” I said. I’m pretty sure she knew that I was not, in fact, open to donating to Bush/Cheney.
• I have yet to read one reasonable defense of keeping marriage heterosexual. Which is really kind of amazing, given that most people seem to be against it. You’d think someone would be able to state why they’re so desperately opposed. Well, at least, be able to state why that doesn’t rely on religious reasons. Or on a call to “tradition,” which is as…um…ignorant a path as you can go down and still have autonomic functions.
• I have, as of yet, no plans to marry gay.

Where the hell are my keys????

Via August J. Pollack I discover what is undoubtedly referred to in other circles as “Uncontrovertible proof that everything can be modernized and set in high school.”

Now, probably you watch MTV and you were already aware of this. I only have two words for you: Get TiVo. Save yourself.