Much has been made in the past week or two about how huge of a bomb the movie John Carter is for Disney. Like anyone here should care except Disney’s accountants. (Seriously: why do people pay so much attention to a company’s financials if they themselves don’t have a horse in the race? I can understand wanting to find out if your favorite company’s going out of business but…if that’s going to happen, a)there will be new companies to enjoy and b)they’ll send a memo around, honest.)
Forget the stupid financials. As many people pointed out, John Carter bombed because it had an amazingly sucky ad campaign. This is one of the few times that I think having the wrong ad campaign really strangled a movie in the cradle, because John Carter is a fun, goofy flick that you can take the whole family to. I’m actually really sorry that Darin and I saw it without the kids, because now one of us in two or three weeks is going to have to go see it again (if, of course, any theaters still have it).
John Carter is the story of a guy in the American Old West (whose name is…wait for it…John Carter) who finds a portal to Mars. There he discovers all manner of strange and crazy creatures, and he gets involved in the middle of a planet-wide civil war, where he promptly falls in love with Princess Dejah, who has to marry someone else. Huge epic battles! Crazy non-terrestrial machines! Mark Strong as the bad guy! (I know, right? Like that came as a huge surprise — I think he’s contractually obligated to be the bad guy in every picture these days.)
The movie isn’t deep. It’s not educational. It was a lot of fun, however. The movie rarely stops to explain anything, figuring the audience will just pick it up as we go along, and since it’s not especially layered or confusing, we do. I really liked Taylor Kitsch as John Carter — he seems like he’s having a great deal of fun, even if he does have to spend most of the movie half-undressed. (Ladies.) The female lead is nothing to write home about, but they so rarely are these days, and that’s a topic for a rant another time.
There is a lot of fighting, but all of the blood spilled is a turquoise blue, not red (which doesn’t explain why everyone is clearly red-tinted, not…oh forget about it), so I don’t think kids would be especially grossed out. There are cute alien babies and giant machines and people wearing crazy costumes. It’s a fun weekend serial.
I’m just sorry it had such a sucky trailer.
I really liked the book and am anxiously waiting to see the film. I guess it was a coincidence that I read the book three weeks before the film was released. I did not know the film was even in process.