Nobody Knows Anything

Via Commute by Bike, it’s the World’s Best Card Trick!

(Okay, I am so lame I don’t know how to embed YouTube video. Sigh.)

(Oh, it turns out YouTube is lame and doesn’t support MT yet. Carry on.)

Now, maybe everyone else in this area drives a whole bunch more than I do and they already knew about this, but I just discovered one of the coolest features of living in this area.

So there we are, driving up Highway 17, heading to 85, and then to Simon’s preschool when BAM! Someone throws something at our car.

Except there aren’t any other cars around. Hmm.

On the connector between 17 and 85 the car starts driving funny and I think, “I bet this is the situation people refer to as ‘a flat tire.’”

I pull out the phone and call the preschool to let them know I’ll be late. Then I dig out my AAA card and get ready to call.

A tow truck pulls up behind us. Oh great, think I, a freelancer. I tell Sophia to remain belted in, just in case. In case of what? I don’t know. But it seems like the prudent maneuver.

The guy comes over to the passenger window and says that he’s with the Freeway Service Patrol and he’d be happy to change my tire for free. Which he proceeds to do in about 15 minutes. He asks me to fill out a little survey form and mail it back at my convenience. And then we’re all done and I continue on my way. I end up being about 10 minutes late picking Simon up.

Coolest. Thing. Ever.

And I don’t have to use up one of my AAA freebies.

If you drive in the Greater Bay Area, you need these guys’ brochure in your glove compartment.

Sorry, haven’t been around much — both kids have been off school, and I have done such things as go to Bonfante Gardens twice in two weeks. (And boy, are my arms tired.) And now after our break it’s time to get ready for school, which involves running around and getting the list of silly school supplies required (TWELVE sticks of glue?). And every fall the kids get new lunch boxes.

Simon took approximately 0.000000004 seconds to choose his: the Batman lunch box, which came complete with cape on the back! Sophia chose the Lil Bratz one, mostly because it was pink. (I’m fairly sure she doesn’t have any Bratz dolls.) And they’ve been very excited about their lunch boxes since we brought them home.

And then Simon mentioned that the Batman box’s cape was all wrong: it had a straight edge instead of points. I thought it was funny that he noticed such a detail about the cape.

Then he mentioned that the Bat symbol on the front was different.

I looked at it, and yup, he was right, that’s not the Bat symbol. The Bat symbol has one points in the middle of each wing; this lunchbox’s symbol has two points.

Damnation. This is a counterfeit lunch box. And it’s probably not really Thermos brand either.

The weird thing is, I didn’t buy this at a corner off Capitol Expressway, I bought this at Target. You know, major corporation, central supply facility, etc. You’d think they’d have buyers who would, you know, notice these kinds of things.

Now, Simon loves his lunch box, and I realize that this is not the end of the world. But am I supposed to mention something to Target — “By the way, you’re selling fakes!” Am I supposed to take this from Simon and try to return it?

I keep opening these links and then losing where I got them from, but here are some good links I’ve found:

Life? It can be a musical. At college, at any rate. (Wait! I remember this one. Via Suburban Guerilla.)

Maureen Johnson on How To Write A Book.

Tell me the Amateur Gourmet doesn’t make you want to run right out and make a quiche. Or at least be a witty Jewish playwright in New York.

How to Write Screenplays. Badly. is always hilarious. Clearly, this guy will have a 3-picture deal soon.

I spent it flying. With two kids. It was even more fun than you can imagine. (As John Rogers and George RR Martin put it, that’s the point. I was so clearly the harried mother of two in the pre-board line that the attendant letting us on let me go on without having to go through the pre-board search. So I walked on with two bottles of water. So much for TSA Security.)

After a few days away, I am so happy to be home again. The odd thing is, I feel as though I was away for weeks. I keep wondering why Mel Gibson is still on the cover of People. Have the shops in town changed any?

My lovely, talented, and amazing daughter found my notebook in a place where I would never have thought to look for it and have no idea how it might have migrated there: a bag of toys rounded up and stuck under the kitchen desk a long time ago.

But who cares. It’s found.

What’s funny is, even when I was freaking out about it on Friday, I had a quiet, calm voice in my head saying, “You wrote it once, you can write it again. Everything is fine.” So I got over my upset a lot faster than I might have once. It’s like I’m growing up or something. (Which is good, given that my birthday is this week.)

Off to transcribe.

and just can’t think of what else to do with it: the OhMiBod.

This will bring a whole new meaning to the happy faces of iPodded runners who whiz by.

(Via Feministing.)

I’ve just discovered the downside of writing in a notebook as opposed to writing on a computer.

You can lose a notebook. I ain’t lost track of a computer yet.

Later: I decided to go out for a bike ride and retrace all my steps yesterday from the last place I am absolutely sure I had the notebook, which was at the fountain park with Simon. So I ended up taking a five mile bike ride this afternoon, which is good, but there is no notebook to be had, which is bad. Given the wind we’re having today, if the notebook was out there, it is gone by now.

This’ll larn me to enter in what I’ve fucking written down a little more promptly. Fifty to sixty pages appear to be gone.

Needless to say, I am not a happy camper right now.