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Welcome to Diane Patterson's eclectic blog about what strikes her fancy

Archives for April 2003

Doin’ the tourist thing

Posted on April 20, 2003 Written by Diane

“What’re we doing today?”

“I dunno.”

“Everyone we know is out of town…Well, to be more exact, all of Sophia’s friends are out of town.”

For a couple of seconds we contemplated going to Disneyland, but today was a blocked out day for the Annual Pass holders (like us), so we decided to do other touristy things instead.

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We started off in Pasadena, where we had breakfast at Mi Piace, which has a very, very good brunch. I was biased against Mi Piace for the first several years we were here, because we went to the one in Burbank a couple of times with Darin’s friends and every time we went something horrible went wrong. The Pasadena location, however, has always been very, very good to us.

We hit the Barnes and Noble for an hour of so of story reading time (and Darin went nuts buying books, something he hasn’t done for a long stretch—yes, we’re about to move, but hey, someone else will be carrying the boxes), and then we hit the road.

“How about we go to Malibu?” Darin said.

I said that was fine with me. Probably not too many Malibu driving trips on the agenda in the near future.

There was terrible traffic on the Pacific Coast Highway, but who cared: it wasn’t like we were trying to get anywhere, and the kids were asleep anyhow. I looked out at the beach as we drove.

“We never took them to the beach!” I wailed.

“Hon, we’re still going to be in California. It’ll be the same ocean even.”

Okay, so I’ve been freaking out about the little things.

We parked in Santa Monica and decided to get some lunch at Il Fornaio. I wasn’t terribly hungry, so I just had soup. Darin had a small plate of ravioli. Sophia ate nothing. Simon ate almost an entire plate of pasta with cheese. Every stereotype I’ve ever heard about the differences in eating between boys and girls…well, let’s just say the kids aren’t dispelling them right now.

Then we got very touristy and did something Darin and I have never done, with or without kids.

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The Santa Monica Pier is a boardwalk filled with junky food (cotton candy and churros), junky clothing (does anyone except anorexic fifteen-year-olds wear those clothes?), games where you win gigantic stuffed animals, and carnival rides, including a pretty big roller coaster. But everything was for the taller end of the human spectrum.

We thought we were going to get out of there scott-free, until we discovered the kids’ part of the boardwalk: rides just for the 48-inch and under set. You tell me if Sophia wanted to go on rides and whether she enjoyed any second of it:

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Crying. Hysteria. “I don’t want to leave.”

Daddy took Sophia down to the beach, where she could kick off her sandals and run free:

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(Poor Simon. Trapped in the stroller. Although if the past few days give any indication, he’ll be running on that beach with Fia in less than a week.)

When it was time to leave the beach…Crying. Hysteria. “I don’t want to leave.”

We were dragging her off the pier when we discovered the Carousel. Oh, can’t resist a carousel. Mommy and Daughter rode the Carousel twice. Before the second ride I explained that this was the last time. At the end of the second ride, Sophia began to negotiate for “just one more ride.” We said no. Crying. Hysteria. Etc.

By now Sophia was finally hungry and wanted chicken. More specifically, she wanted chicken with peapods, which is her favorite dish at PF Chang’s. So we found a Chinese restaurant.

“Does she eat Chinese food?” the waitress asked.

“In fact, she’s why we’re here,” Darin said.

Sophia ate—and, to no one’s surprise, so did Simon—and then we headed home. Amazingly, none of us (including parents) fell asleep in the car. The kids fussed a little about going to bed, but it was strictly pro forma fussing.

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Filed Under: I Love LA

Put the net out already

Posted on April 16, 2003 Written by Diane

Yo, universe. Yes, you. Stop it.

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Reportedly moving is right up there with death on the stress-o-meter.

I don’t know. Never experienced death. Don’t want to. It won’t be pretty.

I’m having a time of it right now. I have to stop thinking of the ways it could be worse, because I’m scared I’m going to give the universe ideas. Now, you say, the universe is pretty much just a concept, not an entity who can understand and act upon those understandings. And I’d agree with you. But I still don’t want to give it any ideas.

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The other day, the same day we got rearended, I took the kids to get their portrait taken. Of course they both fell asleep in the car and I didn’t have the heart to wake them up. Then it turned out that we were an hour late to the sitting anyhow. It was raining; let’s just go home.

On the way home there was a large Crack! on the windshield, and the babysitter and I both jumped in our seats. A rock or something, we thought.

Today I discovered that there was a good chunk taken out of the windshield. And there’s a crack starting to run through it. The windshield’s got to be replaced.

Oh joy. We get to pay the first $500.

Right before our auto insurance is about to expire.

And you know, we’re moving. So we’re going to renew our auto insurance and then move and have to re-renew it.

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Turns out Bank of America has completely fucked up our credit rating. Says one of our mortgage payments was 90 days late. Uh, BofA? We paid our mortgage by direct deposit, fuckers.

(Stress makes me swear like a sailor.)

I have to dig out the BofA statements, get on the phone, and keep dogging them until they fix it and fix it right now, so we can qualify for a new goddamn mortgage.

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I think I’ve been on the phone non-stop for the past three days. Setting up inspections. (Jesus, there are a lot of inspections when you want to sell a house. It’s getting to be expensive just to sell a damn house.) Calling various insurance companies. Finding out from the mortgage broker what else we have to do to qualify for a ridiculous mortgage.

Then I relax with my computer and unearth scary articles about how there are no preschool spots available in Silicon Valley.

I’d start taking Xanax or something, but I’m still nursing.

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We’ve picked our move date. Sure, I said. Let’s do it, I said. Everything will work out. Let’s leap into the unknown, I said. Thinking, of course, of the saying: “Leap and a net will appear.” I repeat that to myself a lot recently, in the hopes that the damned net-holders will show up and put the net out.

Any time, guys. Any time you want to put that net out, go ahead.

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Update: The babysitter came home from the zoo with the kids. Fia’s completely wiped out. But Simon woke up after a short nap and we cuddled for a while, which made me feel a little better. Then we shared some dinner. Are babies supposed to enjoy New England clam chowder that much?

I love my little honeys. And as long as I keep them in mind, I’m doing okay.

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Filed Under: All About Moi

Morning thoughts

Posted on April 16, 2003 Written by Diane

I was awakened this morning by the dulcet tones of my daughter yelling, “Mooooooooommmmmmmmmmeeeeeeeee.” Over and over again. Since she was using the same non-emergency yell she does every morning, I took a shower before heading upstairs.When I got out of the shower she was not yelling. In fact, I heard very little noise, which to all parents is the sign that the kids are Up To No Good.

Actually, what they were up to was pretty cute. When I got to the kids’ room I discovered that somehow Sophia had gotten into Simon’s crib (her superhero identity is, after all, Danger Girl) and the two of them were playing there. Which, you know, would be a much better way to start the day than yelling, “MOOOOMMMMEEEEEE.” At least for me.

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So we came out to the kitchen to make breakfast. I’ve started to make oatmeal again every morning, because it’s easier than deciding what to eat each and every a.m. I bought a box of McCann’s Quick Cooking Irish Oatmeal, which takes a few minutes to make, instead of cooking up a pot of steel cut oats at the beginning of the week and eating a little bit every day.

Can someone explain this to me? The cooking instructions, for both traditional (on the stove) and microwave is to take a 1/3 cup of oatmeal, mix with water or milk, and cook. Makes a darn fine size bowl of oatmeal. The nutritional information, however, is for a serving size of 1/2 cup of dry oatmeal. Why on earth would they do that? It’s not hard to figure the math for the calories in a 1/3 cup, but still.

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Filed Under: Kids

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